Self-Centered

In school, we’re taught that the Earth spins on an axis and revolves around a big star we call the Sun. It is basic, 1st Grade science everyone tends to learn early in life. Yet some toxic people must have ignored this, as they believe the Earth revolves around them. Many toxic people are known for their selfish or self-centered ways, where they do not care one bit about other people. They only care about themselves.

If their best friend and wife were hanging on a ledge, and they could only save one, they’d likely let both of them fall as they order a pizza. That’s a dramatic example, but it is truly how these people are. No problems other than their own count, the health and safety of others will never be their concern. Wait in lines? Not them, they are too important for that. To know someone like this can be weird, as you see them glide through life assuming the world caters to their movement through life.

Dishonesty/Lying

This should be obvious, but lying is rarely ever a good thing. Of course, while this is one of the most toxic personality traits one can have…one does not need to be “toxic” to lie. We often see this happen among kids, and it is usually done as a way to fit in with their peers. If there is nothing exciting about them, they need to come up with something to seem special. Hence, the reason for those lies.

Yet as we grow up, there is rarely a need to lie. Some might still do it if they have social problems, causing them to lack many if any friends. However, there are others who just lie for no real reason. It is part of their personality to do so, and that is when things become toxic. You also can never truly know when they are lying or telling the truth, making them incredibly untrustworthy. A certain public figure was known for this, making most dislike him because they saw through the lies.

Negativity

Both men and women have claimed that one of the biggest turn-offs to a person is an overly negative mindset or personality. It makes sense, as nearly everything comes with a Debbie Downer-like attitude. You cannot tell them anything you hope to get a positive reaction about, as they won’t be happy for you. This makes it hard to be friends or romantic partners with people like this as any good news you’re excited about will be met with absolutely zero joy.

We want others to give us joy and positivity back when we tell them exciting things about us. It is part of human interaction, and we all truly need this. That is also why a more positive attitude makes a person more likable. You WANT to tell them happy news because they will give you happiness back. You might even feel comfortable telling them bad news as they will try to spin something positive out of it to make you feel better. Overall, a negative attitude or personality is like a black hole. No one wants to be caught up in that.

Manipulative

We should first reference that people who successfully manipulate others often tend to pick targets that are much easier to manipulate. This happens in politics all the time. A person can get involved and reference things people agree with. That builds up faith or confidence for you with that group. Then you sprinkle in fakeness or lies, and since you already have them buying that you believe as they do, they are more likely to believe you.

Yet in the real world, being manipulative takes more creativity and targets are sometimes hard to spot. The hardest to manipulate is a generally curious person, as they will never truly believe you unless they do research first. Yet easier targets can be taken advantage of often. That is why this is one of the most toxic personality traits. Those who were manipulated will naturally never want to be around the manipulated again. That makes this one of the few things one can do that, if caught, instantly ends any conversation or relationship for most.

They Bring Out The Worst In YOU

Your parents may have prevented you from hanging out with a specific friend. They might have even encouraged you to find other friends besides them. If this happened, they likely saw how that friend was changing you for the worst. As we age, our parents are not there to spot things and keep us from bad friends. We have to know how to do this for ourselves when we reach adulthood. Yet that is not always an easy thing to do, as some toxic people may not present as technically “toxic.”

Rather, they will appear normal yet slowly start to affect you. While family and friends can see the clear change, it is not always possible for you to see it for yourself. Truly, one of the most toxic personality traits is the ability to change others to bring the worst out of them. This is done for a few reasons. First, to make you act wrong enough to get others to say something to you about it. Then to use that to fuel wrongness in other ways, allowing them to manipulate you. See? It all works together for toxic people. They are like an infection while these traits are the symptoms. Remove the infection, get rid of the symptoms.

SOURCES:

American Psychological Association (APA)

National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH)

Association for Psychological Science (APS)

Harvard University

University of Rochester

Psychology Today

Huffington Post

Vox

Very Well Mind